Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Has the F word replaced the infamous "Shit"?



A few days ago, I read a book written by a renowned Indian author. The book was well written with an interesting storyline and a nail biting finish but I came across the infamous “Fuck” in nearly every chapter where; either the protagonist or his mates or his girlfriend used it with great alacrity. That made me wonder as to what has happened to good old English where the F word was never mentioned in any of the books we read as children or never caressed our lips like it does now. It seems more a slap across the cheek than a caress. It’s like “Here a fuck, there a fuck, everywhere a fuck, fuck!”

Earlier we used “Oh no”, a normal reaction if something was unsatisfactory or fallacious. The “oh no” was unconsciously replaced by “Oh Shit”. So, if something went wrong we’d go “Oh Shit” or “Shit, shit, shit!!” Not that the problem would be solved by constant use of this defecating word.
I remember a few years back I bought a book “Oh Shit not again” written by an Indian author. I seriously don’t know what made me do so. I should’ve guessed from the title itself that it was “Shit” and I said to myself “ Oh shit never again” after reading this horrendous piece of so called literature.

I use the word “Shit” a lot. But, after having offspring of my own, the word “Shit” has been consciously shortened to “Shhhh” or an “oh shit” to “Ohsssshh”. I don’t want the little sod going “shit” whenever he does something naughty because then I’m sure it would be used throughout the day. And, I’ve got enough of his shit to clean up anyway. (Please excuse the smutty writing).

But, now the “Oh shit” or “Shit” has been replaced by “Oh Fuck” or “Fuck” respectively. So, if a person is angry with someone, he or she volleys out the expletive “Fuck you, B@#$%%*!” with great fervor.
When you refer to a dictionary “Fuck” means ‘To have sexual intercourse with’ or ‘an act of sexual intercourse’. So, when a person says “Fuck you” or “ Fuck off” , does he mean that you have to have sexual intercourse with yourself? Is that humanly possible? Are we asexual? Or does he mean “Go masturbate”. It’s a pretty perplexing and a befuddling statement, if I may say so.

The ridiculous part is that this word is part of all the Websters, Colins, Oxford dictionaries of the world and God knows myriads more. It seems to have originated in 1475 . In ancient England a person could not have sex unless you had consent of the King (unless you were in the Royal Family). When anyone wanted to have a baby, they got consent of the King, the King gave them a placard that they hung on their door while they were having sex. The placard had F.*.*.*. (Fornication Under Consent of the King) on it. Now you know where that came from.
(Imagine if such permission was needed from the Prime Minister or President of India, we surely wouldn't be as populous a nation as we are today.)

We hear it in movies be it Hollywood or Bollywood...(hmmmm not yet, only the finger is shown) and in songs. It’s even part of the name of a music group, LMFAO. How original!! Though in Bollywood, thanks to our “Mary Magdalene most holy” censor board, a kiss is looked at as distasteful and irrelevant in a movie too.
Personally, the only problem which I foresee is our offspring or nieces, nephews, etc picking up one of these books written by authors who use this word in their so called literary works as randomly as they use the conjunction “And”. But, I guess the word “Fuck” is here to stay and I've to learn to accept the inevitable where in time that expletive would be replaced by another profane, obscene, vulgar word. And, then “Fuck” won’t sound so mind numbing or shocking like it did or does today. I guess we’ll all have to wait and see. Till then I’ll be content with the other F word….Food.


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