Two years since Grandma's gone

Two years have passed and I often wonder why,
why did you suddenly leave us without saying good bye.
But no Nana, I'm not hear to mourn or feel doleful and sad
cause' memories of you fill my heart with happiness and make me feel glad.
You lived a wonderful life to it's fullest capacity,
we were indeed blessed to have you and you....us, 
as part of family.

Nana, you were truly an epitome of style and grace.
Memories of you always put a smile on my face.
I remember you wanting to get your nails and eyebrows done,
even at eighty,you were always impeccably dressed, 
not a hair out of place,always tied in a bun.
Your heartiness, your infectious laughter and the songs you sang to us brings back fond memories,
and also your culinary skills and concoctions of various delicacies.
I still smile to myself when I think of you chomping on farsans and Aliva biscuits,
perched on your favourite maroon chair in front of the kitchen cabinet.

Oh Nana, I miss you immensely and wished longer you had stayed,
but then no human can ever understand God's plans or ways.
So take care of us and shower on us your blessings and abundant love,
Till we finally meet one fine day in heaven up above.

Camera, Sound, Action in Peace Yashji...RIP

The Bollywood King of romance, yesterday breathed his last,
but he was the only legend who made film making, 
seem to be such an effortless task.
Yash Chopra in his " Waqt" made movies over five decades
broke societal  "Deewar" with some,
and left us with some memorable "Lamhe".
He wrote, directed and produced with great " Joshila",
hit after hit after hit ....from Aaina to Trishul,
from Kaala Pathar to the romantic Veer-Zaara.

"Dil toh Pagal hai" was indeed his motto,
and so in his own signature styles of romance, music and European settings,
classic love stories, he narrated to us galore.
His "Daag" was spotless just like his effervescent  "Chandni"
and twisted and wittily romantic like the vivacious "Bunty and Babli".
"Kabhi Kabhi " in Bollywood, "Rab ne bana di Jodi",
a super combination of musical love stories, sceneries
and the ever youthful Yash Chopraji.
Because no one could and can make movies with such great élan,
and he did as he believed he would do so..
"Jab tak hain Jaan", "Jab tak hain Jaan", "Jab tak hain Jaan"!

So the Gods up in Heaven for this great man, please make lots of room,
Cause' it's your turn now to "Jhoom Barabar Jhoom"
and he's going to ensure you all do so with a great big "Dhoom"!

A Birthday Poem to My Mother-in-Law..

It's said if you unscramble MOTHER-IN-LAW, you get WOMAN HITLER,
but my mother-in-law is a far cry  from it,
so to the above saying, I do not adhere.
She cannot take the place of my mother,
but she's a mother to me in her own way,
She's after all the husband's mother.... what more can I say.

Cause' if my husband has turned out the way he has....
a truly wonderful  human being,
then full credit goes to his mum,
because she's the one who rocked his cradle, 
the one behind the scenes.
She selflessly cooks and works till she drops,
a typical mom, all loving, caring and kind.
She pampers us all from husband to grandson,
but never ever seems to mind.

She's no Niharika of Bade Ache Lagte Hain,
or a "Monster-in-Law", Jane Fonda
But a better Saasu Maa than that of  Mona Singh's,
of Kya hua Tera Vaada.

No, I've not written this blog to butter her up or add Amul Maska,
I just want to wish her only the best on her birthday
and tell her I'm proud to be the "Rangel Bahu"
of this wonderful lady..my " Saasu Maa"!

A Funny Birthday Poem for the husband

So my darling husband, today you turn Thirty One,
Having you on the other side of thirty seems a lot of fun,
for three long years, I traversed it alone,
but now as we walk hand in hand,
you can't poke fun at my age or my "wobbly, rickety bones"!
Six years ago, when we first met,
your pate was covered with hair, black as jet.
But you're hair has lessened and you've turned a wee bit grey,
What to do, my darling, this lucky charm, came your way!!;)

But don't worry, my love, it is said a bald pate is a sign of prosperity,
so cheer up, you've succeeded, 
you've got a son like Mikhail and a wife like me.
And we are going to ensure that we always keep you forever young,
an Usain Bolt, a Messi, a Schumacher all rolled into one.
But on a more serious note, 
loads and loads of love, laughter and happiness I send your way,
please come home early from work
you've to eat the spread I've cooked for you,
on your special day!!

ABCs of a Husband to a Wife...

A is for Appetite which is common in men,
they are voracious, edacious eaters,
so remember, when you're cooking for four,
ensure you've cooked for ten.

B is for Bed of which he occupies the most,
they'll spread their legs and stretch,
and if there's a kid in-between,
then bid farewell to getting even one-fourth.

C is for Cars which they are crazy about,
they won't ogle at a woman as much,
but at a Maserati or Ferrari 
they'll drool over no doubt.

D is for Driving which they feel they know best,
so even if he's lost his way and you intervene with your directions,
he'll act like he's right and put your patience to the test.

E is for Ego which in most men is a common trait,
comparisons made to other men or husbands,
is something husbands dislike and hate.

F is for Finances which is best if left to them to manage,
as long as our shopping sprees and needs are funded,
why bite off more than we can chew,
and cause unnecessary financial damage.

G is for Grocery shopping which they're not very good in,
they may buy 100 grams of beans instead of 500 grams,
which for a single person isn't sufficient.

H is for Housework which if the husband says he'll do,
don't expect him to start immediately,
but he'll do it at his own leisure and pace,
he may not start midday but before the day ends...hopefully.

I is for IPad which is the husband's favourite pastime in the loo,
earlier it was the newspaper,
But now that has been replaced by the IPad,
where he plays online football, tennis and sudoku.

J is for Jokey which they mostly are,
when it comes to joking about their wives,
Husbands take the cake so far.

K is for Kids, he may want none or one,
he may want to adopt a dog instead,
but let him know that better than ruining just a rug,
ruining your lives together with a kid is more fun.

L is for Laundry, a chore in which he feels he's an expert,
he may not do it at all,
but he'll instruct how to wash his pants, his socks,
and how to scrub the collar of his shirt.

M is for Movies which mostly are sci-fi, thrillers or action,
he may accompany you for romantic tear jerking movies,
but that's just for your happiness and satisfaction.

N is for Neckties which he always can't seem to find,
they may be staring right at him,
but he'll always call you to help,
hoping you won't mind.

O is for Orders which husbands are famous in giving,
they'll order what they want for lunch, dinner and dessert,
but if they love what you cook,
Forget mothers-in-law,
from your hands they'll forever be eating.

P is for Presents which he may not always surprise you and give,
but as long as he's present whenever you need him,
happy with him you'll always live.

Q is for Questions he may ask when he sees a big bill,
if you spend everything in his lifetime,
he'll have nothing to leave for you in his will.

R is for Reasoning in which they think they are masters,
they'll give you a hundred reasons as to why you made a mistake,
but if they want to do something,
no reasoning can change their minds made of hard, cold alabaster.

S is for Snores which will keep you awake late into the night,
you may try to sleep with the noise,
but one loud snore is sufficient,
to make you jump up in fright.

T is for Television to which they are glued,
if there's football or cricket on TV,
they won't be distracted or lose concentration,
if you shave your head bald or stand in the nude.

U is for Underwear which for the husband you may have to buy,
even though you feel awkward or embarrassed 
or blush pink shy.

V is for Vocal which most men are not,
he'll answer in yes, no and okay,
and mostly keep mum,
if he knows your birthday he forgot.

W is for Wallet which he'll use till it tears,
husbands feel it's lucky for them,
and unlimited currency notes it bears.

X is for Xerox copies of actors they like to ape,
be it the little beard of Aamir Khan,
or the Hair style of Salman Khan or Professor Snape.

Y is for Young which they always act the opposite of,
especially when it comes to housework,
or throwing garbage in the garbage Shute or garbage box.

Z is for Zanny, zippy, zealous, zesty, they are all made up of this combination,
if they didn't have these zees in them,
we wives wouldn't have for them,
such strong love and admiration.

"Chapati" Making and Geometry....what a similarity!!

Chapati making and Geometry are so similar you see,
both involve making shapes,
which is and has always been, a daunting task for me.
In geometry you have to draw circles based on radius,
 where diameter =2R and 2Pi R= Circumference,
but in the case of chapatis, 
you roll out dough based on your own approximate inference.

You make small balls to roll out into flat roundels or discs.
But sadly,  in this art of preparing chapatis,
 I haven't achieved "culinary bliss".
This flat unleavened bread has been made in various shapes and odd ways,
from countries to continents, to rectangles, to trapeziums,
and also hearts, which I've now reserved only for Valentine's day.
I know I was dreadful in geometry and till this day too
I remember not completing the SSC test paper,
Oh Geometry ...how I hated you!!

But whoever thought that geometry was ever needed in the kitchen,
if chapati is known as "unleavened" flat bread,
why leaven it or shape it when you can enjoy it best..... uneven!!

Sometimes.....Some people...

Sometimes..... some people walk into your lives and cast a magic spell,
you laugh with them, you cry with them and everything seems swell.
Then suddenly, these people just vanish from your life.
Their disappearing act, their nonchalant existence does hurt,
it cuts sharply like a knife.

Sometimes...... with  some people, we spend just a few minutes
but their memories remain in our hearts and minds for years,
that whenever we think of them,
we miss them and our eyes well up in tears.

Someday...... I hope I'd meet these people, 
even though I'll be all old, pale and senile,
I'd like to see and talk to them
and bid adieu with my crooked toothless smile.

A to Z of Marriage to a Husband....

A - is for Adore and Acceptance of your wife just the way she is,
If you don't, you'll be paying the other A for Alimony
and can bid farewell to marital bliss.

B - Be best friends with each other, a mate and lover,
But don't ogle at her best friends,
though they may look hotter than her.

C - C is for Compromise, something you'll have to do more often than not,
but please don't be caught in a compromising position,
you may scar her for life or give her a shock.

D - Discover new things together, new positions, new ways,
But remember she's moody at times too,
so be prepared for some " dry days"!

E - Encourage her in her every endeavor, even if she is dreadful at it,
because if you commit the fallacy of pointing it out,
She has memorized all your shortcomings, 
and may  have even made a list.

F - Forgive her if she overspends or exceeds the credit card limit,
because for every purchase made, even though frivolous, 
she'll ensure that she has an excuse which is very legitimate.

G - G is for Gifts which she loves to receive,
not only on special occasions or birthdays and anniversaries.
Gifts can be given throughout the year,
so don't forget to budget it, 
in your monthly expenditure.

H - H is for Humour, for her a very important quality indeed,
because with time,from a hunk you may turn into a bald toothless tub of lard,
but if you Humour her always,
she'll be by your side, even at the ripe old age of eighty.

I - I is for Inspiration, you must always be,
which will stimulate her both emotionally and mentally,
But do not be the I for Irritation, if she's burnt the chicken,
because then you would have stimulated her verbally.

J - J is for Joking with her and having fun,
but not joking about her always, in front of everyone,
Because if you do, you can say hello to the couch,
And thank God if she's not yet thrown you out of the house.   

K - K is for Kisses which are strictly meant for her,
in health and in sickness if she's down with high fever,
and also ensure to continue those kisses,
when she's not waxed or bleached and resembles a hairy beaver.

L - L is for Loving her with all your heart,
even with her burps, belches and noisy farts.
Loving her completely both body and soul,
though many a times, in your pocket,
she burns a big hole.

M - M is for Make up which you need to do first after a fight,
because if you want a happy marriage, 
don't forget, to acknowledge that the wife is always right.

N - N is for No a word which you must strike out from your vocabulary,
because after marriage, the wife loves to hear the word " yes" from her husband's mouth, positively and emphatically.

O - O is for Open minded, a mindset which after marriage you need to adopt,
don't fret if she's late from work or she's bought a dress with the plunging neckline,
she's wearing it so that for you, she'll always look " hot".

P - P is for "Putting things back in the correct place", a skill which you need to develop,
because men have this disgusting habit of using things,
and leaving them anywhere, for the poor wife to clean or pick up.

Q - Q is to be Quiet when she is angry and never whisper a word,
Because if you do so my friend
you'll be scolded at and abused in the most colourful language,
you've never ever heard.

R - R is to Remember important days and remember her clothes,
because men have memories like a sieve,
and can't remember what their wives wore yesterday,
or even that special day, when they proposed.

S -  is for Saying  'I love you' to your wife,
and meaning every word that you say,
you may take the ' I love you' for granted,
but your wife loves hearing those three little words,
each and every, single day.

T - T is for the Time taken to spend with your wife,
and spent only with her,
not time spent with the IPad or television,
or reading a book or the morning newspaper.

U - U is to be Understanding even when she's not,
especially during those painful few days every month,
causing mood swings and emotional upswings,
and causing her to cut like a knife and be blunt.

V - V is for Vague answers  which she does not like,
she doesn't like beating around the bush and prefers answers to the point.
So if she asks you "what you're thinking?",
and you vaguely say nothing, 
don't be surprised if you see your wife, in the kitchen grumpy and scowling.

W - W is for not Waking her up with your horrific loud snores,
you'll keep her up all night so please do something about it,
or else you'll have to make your bed on the cold hard floor.

X - X is for Xylol a colorless flammable volatile liquid which you must never be,
if she volatile and throwing bouts of insanity.
Because too much volatility will cause unnecessary disruptions,
which will eventually lead to a marriage dysfunction.

Y - Y is for Yawning which you must not when she talks and talks,
because if you do, she'll ensure to her conversation,
there'll never be a comma or a full and final stop.

Z - Z is for Zealous and dedication to  her you must always show,
because only with love, commitment, zeal and dedication,
will you and your wife in a  marriage, 
happily always grow.

What to gift the husband on his birthday?????

So the husband's birthday is nearly two weeks away,
I've not yet decided what to gift him on his big day.
He doesn't like wearing watches or any "shiny" bling,
Thankfully, without a grumble or whine, he wears the wedding ring.
I know I want to gift him something, but I'm not able to decide,
seriously, it's extremely difficult buying gifts for a guy.

Women are more " birthday friendly",
we know exactly what we want,
it's normally clothes, shoes,watches, jewelry,
a short holiday or maybe a meal at our favourite restaurant.

But when it comes to buying gifts for men,
it seems to be a daunting task,
because they have very expensive taste,
and sometimes wives cannot afford to buy the husbands,
the Omegas, the Porsche, the Nikons... they with subtlety ask.

So I've decided to start the no gifting rule this year,
he's got the best gift anyway.......the gift of a wonderful wife ;)
what is an ordinary gift compared to a human being,
who is his soulmate and the love of his life. :)

P.S. Nigel if you've read this blog, 
this " no gifting" doesn't apply to me,
I love presents on my birthday,
don't forget.....the sound system from
Harman Kardon or Jvc.